I am so blessed to have wonderful people in life who love me and show this amazing amount of support. Not a day goes by that I don't get a call from someone asking me how we are doing. It is really nice, so again thank you to everyone.
This week has been a little tough but hey I am still here right? I met with Michelle from Now I Lay Me Down To Sleep (NILMDTS) and went over what she does and how this whole picture thing works once Sami is born. I swear they are a blessing, to go out of their way to take photos so that we as hurting parents can have such cherished memories. I wish I did not need their services but just in case I want to be ready. I don't want to regret not having photos taken of my little one. The thought of one day forgetting what she looked like scares me. I think they are such a great organization and I really admire them that is why I really want to donate money to them. I have been trying to find an organization to give back to and I think I found it. A shower of well wishes is in store for us (told you we are loved!) and well I would prefer people donate money to them instead of gifts. It would make me feel better knowing that parents who have to go through something like this will be able to use NILMDTS for a long time.
Another thing that happened this week... my brother Ernie went far beyond his call of brotherly duties. He went to the mortuary and started the process for our little Sami. I was dreading having to do that like you would not believe, no parent should ever have to do that, that is just so unfair!!! Him and I had discussed more or less what we had in mind so from that he went and asked if all my wishes were possible and thankfully they are. My biggest concern was that they pick her up from us at the hospital because I refuse to have her in the hospital morgue, not sure why but that thought really bothers me. This whole story is rather disturbing isn't? My gosh she is not even here yet and here I am talking about this. I am glad the process for that has been started only because now I can just not think about or worry about that for a while.
I have also started our birth plan rough draft, seems a little demanding if you really think about it but I just really want to make sure I make my wishes known for labor and delivery. I am not sure how medical staff feels about a person coming in with personal demands but in this situation I feel like I can be a little more demanding as to what I want during labor and after birth. With Julian it just did not go as planned and now I wish I would not have been so afraid to speak my mind, maybe he wouldn't have been in the NICU for a few days. The main focus of this birth plan is so that everyone that will be involved that day knows how important it is for us to have as much time with her as possible. I will post it one day to share with everyone. I have been making changes to it and reading it over and over seems to unreal. Everyday I have to question why this is happening to us.
Well here we are just about 24 weeks already, time is flying by and all I want is to make it stop. This morning I woke up because Sami was having party in my belly!! This little girl is getting way more active now and I am loving it! She is kicking me as I type right now! Larry was having fun touching my belly because he would push down and she would respond to his touch, he gets really excited when that happens. I am really trying to not stress out as much and just take things as they come, hasn't been easy but I am trying. Normally I dread weekends but today has started off so well, I am just going to enjoy it. I am in a happy mood and I have to take advantage of it.
1 year ago